detachment

I hellotxt‘d earlier today, ‘needs to detach and drift free for a while.’ Shortly after, I thought about that statement. Every time I leave the house for ‘shopping’ or ‘out and about’ or a ‘long weekend’ or ‘vacation’. I always considered it an escape, a getting away from the daily reality of life. Inevitably, that escape either does not work, or does not last beyond my arrival home, to my own bed. I believe now that is because I never detach from the everyday. Work obligations creep into my mind. They still hit my phone. I still connect to facebook, perhaps more. I still have the same anxieties I have in daily life. It is because, despite me desire to escape the everyday, I do not detach from the everyday. I cannot let go of the projects at work that are not competed, the ‘friends’ I have on the various services and stuff, the constant connectivity with the rest of the world, however superficial. In a way, I’d rather live my life vicariously through others rather than try living it myself, largely because it is almost easier to do so. Often, I believe this hyperconnected world we live in is causing most of us to be out of touch with reality, seeking instant gratification, thinking it is thoughtful analysis, the thoughtful analysis we are unwilling to do for ourselves. The noise level is so strong that ‘the truth’ is dictated by the loudest and most popular, rather than who is true. In the end, we all need to be entertained. That is what it comes down to for me. ‘Entertain me, or I will be disinterested in you.’ Pass the burden off. 

I do need to detach from this ‘reality’ that I am ‘living’ in. I just need to figure out how.